導(dǎo)讀:成功的創(chuàng)業(yè)者必須對自己的所有承諾負(fù)責(zé)惭蹂，管理對實現(xiàn)承諾的預(yù)期各吨。筆者多年來從強(qiáng)有力的領(lǐng)導(dǎo)者那里學(xué)到了下面這些經(jīng)驗胁住，或許能幫助你在拒絕他人的時候筹吐，不會傷害當(dāng)前的商業(yè)關(guān)系或未來的機(jī)會猛频。

Every entrepreneur I know can’t find enough hours in a day to do the good things they want, and yet they often find themselves saying yes to new requests. Perhaps because they are optimists by nature, or they just hate to disappoint others, they end up hurting their health, credibility and effectiveness by not being able to deliver on everything they promise.

我認(rèn)識的每一位創(chuàng)業(yè)者狮崩，都說自己在一天中找不到足夠的時間去做自己想做的事情，但他們經(jīng)常會答應(yīng)新的請求鹿寻∧啦瘢或許這是因為他們天生就是樂觀主義者，或許是因為他們不愿意讓別人失望毡熏，但最終的結(jié)果是坦敌，他們無法實現(xiàn)自己做出的每一個承諾，進(jìn)而損害了自己的健康痢法、信譽(yù)和效力恬试。

In addition to saying yes too often, some entrepreneurs under pressure say no poorly, by attacking the requestor or by avoiding any definitive response. Either of these approaches always make a difficult situation worse, often leading to guilt or a later accommodation.

除了過于頻繁地說“是”之外，在壓力之下疯暑，有些創(chuàng)業(yè)者也會以非常糟糕的方式說“不”训柴，他們可能會攻擊請求者，或是避免明確的回應(yīng)妇拯。而這兩種方式經(jīng)常是火上澆油幻馁，往往會造成負(fù)罪感或者隨后的妥協(xié)。

A successful entrepreneur must be accountable for all commitments, and manage expectations to make this possible. So here are some tips I have learned over the years from strong leaders that can help you say no without damaging current business relationships or future opportunities:

成功的創(chuàng)業(yè)者必須對自己的所有承諾負(fù)責(zé)越锈，管理對實現(xiàn)承諾的預(yù)期仗嗦。筆者多年來從強(qiáng)有力的領(lǐng)導(dǎo)者那里學(xué)到了下面這些經(jīng)驗，或許能幫助你在拒絕他人的時候甘凭，不會傷害當(dāng)前的商業(yè)關(guān)系或未來的機(jī)會：

1. Establish boundaries and honor them for all to see

1. 設(shè)定讓所有人都知曉的界限稀拐，并堅決執(zhí)行

Let your constituents know your priorities and limits. Don’t continually break your own rules about when you are available or what requests are acceptable. Your actions must match your words, so don’t say yes when you mean no.

讓相關(guān)人士清楚你需要優(yōu)先解決的事情和界限。在何時有空或哪些請求可以接受等問題上丹弱，不要總是破壞你自己設(shè)定的規(guī)矩德撬。你必須言行一致铲咨，如果你內(nèi)心想拒絕，就不要說“是”蜓洪。

2. Ask for time to check your calendar

2. 先查看日程表纤勒，再給明確答復(fù)

It’s an acceptable business practice to review your schedule or converse with other principals before committing to an answer. Don’t respond with a quick yes that you can’t deliver, or a quick no that will ruin a relationship. In all cases, it’s important to commit to a date or time for a final yes or no.

在給出回答之前查看一下日程安排或與其他負(fù)責(zé)人進(jìn)行溝通，是可以接受的商業(yè)行為隆檀。不要馬上同意你無法做到的事情摇天，也不要當(dāng)場拒絕，因為這可能破壞雙方的關(guān)系恐仑。無論如何泉坐，務(wù)必承諾一個給出最終決定的日期或時間。

3. Give credence to your initial instinct

3. 相信你的第一直覺

Recognize that your brain and your body often register information that is more accurate than an optimistic emotional reaction, or a negative reaction after a long hard day. Take a deep breath, clear your mind of any external distractions, and analyze your gut reaction before providing any answer.

要意識到裳仆，你的大腦和身體所記下的信息坚冀，通常比樂觀的情緒反應(yīng)，或者在辛苦工作一天之后所做的負(fù)面情緒反應(yīng)更加準(zhǔn)確鉴逞。在做出任何回答之前记某，深呼吸，清除大腦中的外部干擾构捡，分析你的直覺反應(yīng)液南。

4. Voice both the pros and cons to a trusted cohort

4. 向值得信任的同事說出兩種選擇的利弊

Speaking the considerations out loud will help you make sure you understand the full implications of either a yes or a no answer. Every yes answer increases your workload, and every no answer may cut off an opportunity you need down the road. Talking it out also buys you time.

大聲說出自己的考慮，可以保證你能全面了解接受和拒絕請求的影響勾徽。接受請求將增加你的工作量滑凉，而拒絕可能讓你未來的機(jī)會變成泡影。說出自己的顧慮喘帚，也可以為你贏得緩沖時間畅姊。

5. Explore the possibility of a reciprocal favor

5. 探索互惠互利的可能性

This will help the requester understand the impact of the request, and potentially reconsider. In other cases, you may actually get back more than you give up. Every yes should be a win-win proposition, just like strategic partnerships can bring huge growth to both businesses, despite the work.

這樣做會讓請求者了解其請求的影響，并且有可能會重新考慮吹由。在其他情況下若未，你得到的回報可能遠(yuǎn)遠(yuǎn)高于付出。雖然你的工作會增加倾鲫，但每一次肯定的回答粗合，都應(yīng)該是一個雙贏的局面，正如戰(zhàn)略合作伙伴關(guān)系可以帶動兩家公司快速增長一樣乌昔。

6. Explain your constraints before saying no

6. 在拒絕之前解釋自己的苦衷

Rejection without giving context implies an unreasonable request or a problem with the requestor. People making a request may not understand your budget limitations, current workload or competitive pressures. In this context, you can also make an encouraging statement about future requests.

沒有任何理由的拒絕隙疚，往往暗示請求不合理，或者請求者本身有問題磕道。提出請求的人或許并不清楚你的預(yù)算限制供屉、目前的工作量或競爭壓力。在這種背景下，你也可以對未來的請求做出鼓勵性的聲明伶丐。

7. Say yes to the person and no to the task

7. 對事不對人

Make sure the requestor understands first how positively you feel about them, despite the fact that the requested task cannot be accommodated in your current workload, strategy or other boundary. Requestors are then less likely to be left with the impression that your rejection is a personal affront.

保證請求者清楚你對他們的態(tài)度是肯定的悼做，盡管鑒于你目前的工作量、策略或其他限制撵割，你無法完成請求的任務(wù)贿堰。這樣一來辙芍，請求者就不會認(rèn)為你的拒絕是一種對個人的侮辱啡彬。

8. Sandwich your no between two positives

8. 用積極的理由來解釋拒絕的原因

Make your answer more palatable with a positive explanation. For example, if your partner asks you to cover a conference, but you have development deadlines at risk, explain these commitments (first yes), how they lock you in town (no), and finish by confirming your focus to an on-time product (second yes).

通過積極的解釋，讓你的回答聽上去更順耳故硅。例如：如果你的合作伙伴要求你去參加一次會議庶灿，但你的產(chǎn)品開發(fā)截止日期即將到來，你可以向?qū)Ψ浇忉屵@些任務(wù)（肯定）吃衅，它們?nèi)绾巫屇忝摬婚_身（否定）往踢，最后證明自己的重點(diǎn)是準(zhǔn)時交付一款產(chǎn)品（再次肯定）。

9. Defer the decision to a better environment

9. 推遲到更合適的時間做出決定

Ask for the opportunity to discuss the request when you can give the requestor your full attention. When you are in the normal chaos of the startup day, both parties can be easily misinterpreted. Pay attention to body language and tone that often make the negative response more difficult to receive.

要求在你可以給予請求者全部注意力的時候徘层，再與對方討論其請求峻呕。創(chuàng)業(yè)初期，混亂是常態(tài)趣效，在這種情況下瘦癌，雙方很容易產(chǎn)生誤解。要注意不要做出那種經(jīng)常會讓否定回應(yīng)更加難以接受的身體語言和語調(diào)跷敬。

10. Make sure your words are non-defensive but clearly stated

10. 使用非防衛(wèi)性語言讯私，但一定要表述清楚

No one wins when a requestor reads your softly spoken no as a yes or a maybe. Long, detailed explanations are usually read as defensive or confrontational. The answer should be strong and non-emotional. Just say no clearly, and smile as you say it.

如果請求者將你柔和的拒絕，理解成“是”或者“可能”西傀，最終只會兩敗俱傷斤寇。而長篇大論的解釋，通常會被理解成防衛(wèi)或抵觸拥褂。你的回答應(yīng)該是堅決的娘锁，不能感情用事。你只要明確地拒絕就可以饺鹃，拒絕時不妨報以歉意的微笑致盟。

You don’t have to be viewed as a yes person to be viewed as a leader. In fact, if you look at the leaders around you, they are not afraid to say no to the conventional wisdom, and they gain respect for doing it. They have learned the art of saying no with the same conviction and passion they use in saying yes. That’s the best way to change the world and save yourself, so start today.

你沒有必要為了被其他人視為領(lǐng) 導(dǎo)者，而成為凡事都說OK的人尤慰。事實上馏锡，看看你周圍的領(lǐng)導(dǎo)者，你會發(fā)現(xiàn)他們并不害怕對傳統(tǒng)觀點(diǎn)說不伟端，而且這樣做反而為他們贏得了尊重杯道。他們掌握了拒絕的藝 術(shù)，不論拒絕還是同意，他們都能以同樣的信念和激情說出自己的決定党巾。這才是改變世界和拯救自己的最好方式萎庭，所以就從今天開始吧。