終于完成豆子女士的這篇文章的翻譯工作靠闭，自己在放下這么多年后重新學習英語，第一次嘗試翻譯文章符糊，對于我來說已經是一個宏大的工程了，攢了近兩周才完成呛凶，僅此一篇男娄，就發(fā)現自己在英語學習中的許多問題，當然困難重重下也不乏樂趣，希望自己能堅持下去沪伙。原文及翻貼如下瓮顽，供各路高手批評指正奉呛。
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（以下是原文和翻譯內容藤滥，請不吝賜教)
這樣的文章應該說閱讀量挺大的，初看也覺得蠻有道理参淫，尤其是那些過著并不如意婚姻生活的人翁授，讀來該是頭如搗蒜拣播，呃呃不能再同意吧。
The articles like this should have been read in a quite big quantity. In the first glance,its look like very reasonable, especially by the people who live in an unsatisfied marriage, and at that time,they should have nodded their head and couldn't agree more.
可是仔細想一下收擦，好像這里面有個概念錯誤贮配，仿佛婚姻與自己是兩個獨立的個體，誰遇到誰便怎樣塞赂，可是婚姻不是兩個人共同建立的嗎泪勒，而婚姻走到哪一步，不管是好的還是壞的宴猾，起碼要各負一半的責任圆存，有的婚姻甚至自己負責要更多，這個很難量化仇哆。
But if we think about it carefully, there appears a conceptual mistake, as if marriage and ourselves are two separate individuals, someone meets another one and then they will be.However marriage is a combination of two persons, isn’t it? And no matter where marriage goes to, whether it's good or bad,any part in the marriage has a half responsibility, sometimes even more. It’s hard to quantify.
也就是說沦辙，婚姻的好與壞你要負一半甚至一半以上的責任，怎么叫你遇到壞婚姻讹剔？
That is to say,no matter good or bad in marriage, we have a half or more responsibility.So,how can you say that you meet a bad marriage?
另外油讯，在這文章里舉的例子是如果你不夠好，遇到更好的會把你影像的更好的句子延欠。誠然陌兑，如果你的伴侶足夠優(yōu)秀可以對你有很多積極的影響不假，可是為什么我們會一廂情愿的要求別人足夠好影響帶動我們衫冻，為什么不是我們足夠好影響對方那诀紊，這樣的想象是不是推卸責任？是不是把自己提高的責任壓到別人肩上隅俘？我不夠好邻奠，是因為你不好，因為你不好为居，所以我遇到的是壞的婚姻碌宴，這是不是一種嬰兒的全能自戀？如果自己不能擔負自己成長的責任蒙畴，怎么在婚姻遇到問題時幫助對方贰镣？你的配偶難道是一個完美到何時何地任何年齡情況下都不會脆弱不犯錯誤的完人嗎呜象？退一步講，如果他是碑隆，你是否足夠好能配的上他恭陡？
In addition, the example in the article is that if you're not good enough,you’ll still have the chance to be affected and become better when you meet a good another.Of course, if your marital partner is good enough to you, he or she can give you a lot of positive affections.But why you tend to ask others to be good enough to influence you?Why shouldn’t be yourself?You become the good one to affect others. Is that the imagination which to shirk responsibility? Is it put the pressure of improvement to other's shoulders? "I'm not good enough, because you are not good,then because you are not good, so I meet a bad marriage".that is a baby's narcissism,isn't it? If you can not grow up by your own responsibility,how to help another one when problems happened in your marriage?Is your spouse a perfect one who isn’t fragile and not make any mistake in anytime and anywhere? Or on the other way, if he or she is that perfect one,are you good enough for matching ?
我們在評價自己伴侶時經常進入這樣的誤區(qū)：我當初怎么會找了他，我一定是上當了上煤。這也是一種全能自戀休玩，就是我對于這個結果不負責任，都是別人騙我的劫狠，我是無辜又可憐的拴疤。錯!你當初和誰在一起是你自己的意愿，也就是說独泞，當時當地你做出最有利自己的選擇呐矾，如果當初“被騙”，也是“受騙”滿足了你當時的心理需要而已懦砂，你的責任蜒犯。
We often make the mistakes when we evaluate our partner like this:“How could I find him or her, I must be cheated". This is also a kind of universal narcissism,and means that "I can be irresponsible for this result,I am tricked,and I am innocent and poor.” But that’s wrong! Being together with somebody was your own will at the beginning, that is to say, you made the best choice at that time and in the conditions,if you had been cheated,that was the psychological needs for you by that cheat,it was your fault.
那么我們要怎樣擔負起婚姻的責任那，只能是提高自己內在的能力孕惜，首先在心理上成長為可以為自己行為負責的成年人愧薛，然后找尋自己的成長機會，豐富自己衫画，成為自己∥屠酰婚姻需要經營削罩，兩個人都有責任，但是如果你是那個心理上成熟一點的费奸，你可以幫助你的伴侶走出陰影也是很好的事弥激。肉爛在自家鍋里，分什么你的我的愿阐，只是微服，我們不要讓自己變成在鍋邊哀哀待哺的孩子，對方不添柴缨历，我就吃不上飯以蕴，因為我沒找到一口好鍋啊，我好可憐辛孵。
So,how should we undertake the responsibility of our marriages?The only way is to improve our own internal ability. First,grow up to be adults who can take the responsibility of our behaviors on the psychological way, and then find our opportunities for growth, enrich ourselves, be yourself. Marriage needs the management, it is the responsibility of two people, if you are the maturer one in psychological sense,it’s a good thing while you can help your partner walk out of the shadow.Cooking meats in a pot,how can you know which is yours and which is mine.The point is that we can’t allow ourselves becoming a kid who want to be fed, and consider that“if my partner don’t cook,I will have nothing to eat,I am so poor!”
去找些柴來吧丛肮，一起燒熱這口鍋，溫暖的家的鍋魄缚。
Therefore,find some wood,cook together and warm your home now.
