什么是愛 Love？
在我眼中阱表，廣義的愛是世上一切的真相殿如。是我們作為生命的存在本身以及我們和宇宙的和諧共振。而狹義的愛最爬，是某種決定涉馁，選擇，行為爱致。更狹義一點的愛烤送，是我們和他人（物）建立的深度連結。而人們口中常常討論的愛蒜鸡，其實和愛沒有任何關系胯努。
Love is the ultimate reality. It is the only. The all. The feeling of love is your experience of God. In highest Truth, love is all there is, all there was, and all there ever will be.
All human actions are motivated at their deepest level by one of two emotions - fear or love.
Love is a DECISION. It is a CHOICE. It is an ACTION. It is what we decide to do and the direction we choose to take whenever we reach the Critical Crossroads in our life --- which we do nearly once a day throughout our lives.The Critical Crossroads are what Conversations with God also calls the Choice Points in our lives. These are the moments in which we decide Who We Are and Who We Choose to Be. When we decide that Who We Are is LOVE, that choice --- made in advance of moments, events, situations, and circumstances in our life --- dramatically affects, shapes, and creates the decisions we make about the thoughts, words, and actions we embrace as we move through our lives.
我說牢裳，人與人之間并沒有教或被教這種事逢防。如果說有所謂真正的教育，那不過是愛蒲讯。愛是唯一的教育忘朝。
浪漫關系 Romantic Relationships
浪漫關系，或者是愛情關系是兩個人之間可以建立的最親密的關系判帮。是自我成長的最好的課程局嘁。
如果，當我們對別人說我愛你晦墙，而期待別人也說我愛你悦昵，或者擔心別人不會說我愛你的話。我們可能就沒有真正地活在“愛”中晌畅，而是活在“恐懼”中但指。我們可能認為自己是一個善良慷慨的人（理論上的），可是，當我們進入一段親密關系后棋凳，對伴侶的一些小事斤斤計較拦坠，那么，這就在實踐上顯示出我們離理想中自己的距離剩岳。我們可能認為自己是個獨立女性贞滨，要求平等不依附男性且尊重對方的自由，可是拍棕，當自己進入一段親密關系后晓铆，發(fā)現(xiàn)自己也會有嫉妒控制欲沒有安全感的一面。所以莫湘，親密關系尤蒿，是我們內(nèi)心恐懼情緒最好的鏡子，也最能夠讓我們認清自己幅垮，更好地成長腰池。當然，這些成長的前提是忙芒，我們在戀愛關系中沒有戴著面具示弓， 并且，我們時時反思呵萨。
因此奏属，在浪漫關系中，我們應當關注的是自己潮峦，而不是對方囱皿。也只有當自己內(nèi)心純凈，把自己情感上的恐懼和創(chuàng)傷都療愈好了忱嘹，才能給對方帶來更多的愛而不是傷害嘱腥。在我眼中，對另外一個人最理想的愛拘悦，是無條件的愛齿兔。（當然，我不得不承認础米，我從未做到過分苇。）
Relationships are constantly challenging; constantly calling you to create, express, and experience higher and higher aspects of yourself, grander and grander visions of yourself, ever more magnificent versions of yourself. You can choose to be a person who has resulted simply from what has happened, or from what you’ve chosen to be and do about what has happened. It is in the latter form that creation of Self becomes conscious. It is in the second experience that Self becomes realized.
The purpose of a relationship is to decide what part of yourself you’d like to see “show up,” not what part of another you can capture and hold. There can be only one purpose for relationships—and for all of life: to be and to decide Who You Really Are. - which is love itself.
Most people enter into relationships with an eye toward what they can get out of them, rather than what they can put into them.- Relationships are sacred because they provide life’s grandest opportunity—indeed, its only opportunity—to create and produce the experience of your highest conceptualization of Self. Relationships fail when you see them as life’s grandest opportunity to create and produce the experience of your highest conceptualization of another. Let each person in relationship worry about Self—what Self is being, doing, and having; what Self is wanting, asking, giving; what Self is seeking, creating,experiencing, and all relationships would magnificently serve their purpose—and their participants! Let each person in relationship worry not about the other, but only, only, only about Self.
This seems a strange teaching, for you have been told that in the highest form of relationship, one worries only about the other. Yet I tell you this: your focus upon the other—your obsession with the other—is what causes relationships to fail.
And when you love, be authentic and true. When you love, be authentic and true, and say only, ' At this moment I feel this - when the next moment comes I will tell you'... as if this moment is the whole of life. And I tell you, if you are so loving at this moment then the next moment you will be more loving, because the next moment is born out of this moment. But that is not a promise, not an insurance. If you have loved so totally in this moment you will love even more totally in the next. It looks absurd - how can totality be more? But it happens. Life is absurd. If you have loved totally and authentically and truly and bloomed in this moment, why fear the next moment? You will bloom. Even if this flower fades, another flower will come. Don't be bothered with this flower. Life goes on blooming into this flower, into that one, sometimes on this tree, sometimes on another. But life continues, flowers fade. It means that form fades but the formless goes on moving. So why bother? But you are bothered because you are missing this moment, that is why you are afraid of the next moment. This moment you have not loved; that is why you are making securities for another moment. This moment you have not lived; that is why you are so scare of the unknown. You are making securities for how to live in the next moment.
婚姻 Marriage
目前我看到對婚姻最好的描寫來自奧修的《當鞋合腳時》。
婚姻從歷史以來就和愛沒有關系屁桑。而和社會穩(wěn)定和金錢地位等外在條件有關医寿。只是近代人們才把愛情加入到結婚的條件中。
可是蘑斧，愛情和婚姻本來就是兩個截然不同互不相融的東西靖秩。愛情存在于現(xiàn)在艾帐，存在于每一個雙方產(chǎn)生連結的瞬間中。它可能現(xiàn)在存在盆偿，明天就消失了柒爸。而婚姻的存在是出于對愛情消失的恐懼，于是事扭，政府宣布用結婚證來讓愛情永不過期捎稚。當然，這個證書不過是一個空頭支票求橄。反過來說今野，如果說兩個人真正相愛，并且覺得他們永遠會相愛下去罐农，又有什么結婚的必要呢条霜？
因此，很明確的是涵亏，選擇婚姻和選擇愛情是兩個不同的選擇宰睡。沒有好壞之分，但是很多人把他們混淆了气筋。
那么拆内，愛情就不能持久嗎？其實未必宠默。今天你愛著這個人麸恍，你不知道明天你是不是還會愛著他，也更不知道明天你是不是不會愛他搀矫。因為生命的本質就是不確定的抹沪。
今天你愛著這個人，你覺得自己會永遠愛著對方瓤球，于是融欧，你向對方承諾，你會永遠愛著對方冰垄。但是蹬癌，這僅僅你當下這一刻真實的感覺权她，誰也無法保證虹茶，明天你的承諾能不能兌現(xiàn)，就像我們都不能保證明天會不會還活著那樣隅要。
因此蝴罪，我認為，對待愛情的態(tài)度是步清，今天它發(fā)生了要门，那么愉快地感受它虏肾。不為了明天而焦慮。如果今天好好得愛著欢搜，明天很大程度上會愛得更深封豪，因為明天的開始是今天。但對此炒瘟，我們無法保證吹埠，也無需保證。而對待婚姻的態(tài)度是疮装，它和愛情無關缘琅，和社會穩(wěn)定有關。愛情是自然中盛開的花朵廓推，你不知道它何時會凋零刷袍，婚姻是瓶中的塑料花朵，它永不凋謝樊展。想清楚這些呻纹，無論選擇愛情或者婚姻，都不會讓人糾結困惑了专缠。
A mother's love is unconditional; it is given to you, she shares. A father's love is unconditional - just because you are his child, he loves you, there is no need to earn it. But when you move into the world you have to earn a husband's love, a wife's love. And any moment it can be withdrawn. Fear, insecurity... Hence marriage has come into existence, because lovers are so insecure they want legal sanction. So the government protects them, the society protects them. Otherwise what would be the need for marriage? If love is really there, you need not get married. Why? There is a fear that the love may be here today but who knows about tomorrow? And if love goes, then what will you do? Who will you fall back on? The law, the court, the government - they become the securities. Then you can go to the court and you can demand love.
Every society makes divorce as difficult as possible, marriage as easy as possible. This seems absurd, it should be just the opposite. Marriage should be made as difficult as possible, because two persons are moving in an unknown world; let them wait, watch, think, brood, meditate. Give them time. To my mind it seems that at least three years should be allowed before the court allows anybody to marry. And I think that then nobody would get married!
Life is dangerous, but that is the beauty of it - it is insecure, because insecurity is the very nature of movement, aliveness, vitality. The more dead you are, the more secure. When you are in your grave there will be no danger. What can happen to you anymore? Nothing! Nobody can harm you when you are dead. But when you are alive, you are vulnerable, you can be harmed. But I tell you, that is the beauty of life. A flower in the morning can not believe that by the evening it will be gone. But that is the beauty of it - in the morning it is so glorious, so magnificent, an emperor, and by the evening it is gone. Just think of a flower made of stone or plastic - it remains. It remains; it will never fade. But whenever something never fades it means it never bloomed. Marriage is a plastic flower, love is the real flower - in the morning it blooms, by the evening it has gone. A marriage continues, it has a permanency about it. But in this impermanent world how can anything real be permanent?
Everything real will have to exist moment to moment. And there is insecurity: any moment it can disappear. The flower that blooms will fade; the sun that has arisen will set. Everything will change. If you are too afraid of insecurity then you will make arrangements, and with those arrangements you will kill everything. A wife is a dead beloved, a husband is a murdered lover. Then things are settled - there is no problem. But then the whole life drags.
