I still remember that day when I sat on the sofa, playing with my daughter and said to my husband "please wash the dishes", he said" you always ask me to do something, why don't you do it by yourself?" he did it in the end, but looked really unhappy. I knew there was something wrong with my way of talking. but I didn't know the right one.
Until One day I accidentally saw a video? about an old woman who is more than 70 years old. She is very good at communicating with others, especially with her husband. When her husband washed vegetables to prepare lunch. she said "Wow, you are serious about anything, look at these vegetables, they are shining in your hands". After her husband made lunch, she said again" I appreciate your cooking skills. in my heart the taste is much better than that of restaurants". Her husband was very happy to hear these words. That's the reason why he looks very relax and enjoyable even though he did almost all the housework. On the contrary,? Because of excellent communication skills, the old woman needn't do any housework and with no blame.
Maybe this video is a little exaggerated.? But there is no doubt that it reflects the truth: good communication skills can make you half the work with double results. and different ways of expression can produce different results. fellow members do you want to be this kind of person in your family？ Our real aim is not to avoid doing the housework, but to get some warm help from him on her when we need it.
When I understood this truth, I made up my mind to change my way of speaking. appreciate replace command. my words to my husband became these" You are really a very kind person, Especially you are glad to help others, Honey, now I'm a little busy, could you please wash the dishes? "My dear friends, this time you can imagine the result. Yes, he did it happily.
Good expression skills are not only important in family communication, but also important at work. I am sure all of you once heard a famous history story named Yan Zi's Visit to the Chu state. Yanzi, an ambassador of Qi state, was sent to Chu state to reach an agreement. But The gate soldier of Chu state didn't allow him to get in from the formal gate because of his short height. the soldier said" please go from that side door". Yanzi looked at the door and said calmly" If your state is dogs state, I will go from this side door". The soldier blushed with shame suddenly and speechless. In the end Yanzi got in from the formal gate. The King of Chu state heard this matter. He was very angry and continued to humiliate Yanzi. "I heard that people who come from your state are good at stealing , I don't know why, can you tell me the reason?" said the king disdainfully. Yanzi answered "Orange planted in Huainan,? is called orange, but when it is planted in Huaibei, it will be called Zhi. The reason is the difference in the weather. Similarly, people in Qi state were kind, but after they came to Chu state, they became good at stealing. That's because of the atmosphere of your state. " The king of chu state was impressed by Yanzi's expression and courage. After that, he treated Yanzi as a distinguished guest.
So being good at expression is really a? big advantage. It's also a kind of art. Now we know expression is very important, then how can we get these skills? from the old woman's story, we can extract the truth that never to forget to see the bright side of other people. take toastmasters for example,? when evaluators give us feedback, they will tell us some advantages first, then no matter how much advice they give us, we will accept it easily. This is a good expression skill. From Yanzi's story we know that convincing evidence is indispensable in our conversation.
No matter where we are, Whatever the role is, in the family as a husband or wife,? in a company as a leader or just an ordinary staff member. All of us should learn expression skills. Because in this way, not only can we get an easier and more smooth life, but also people around us will have a happier experience.
