愛的語言
如果你在生活中和某個(gè)人產(chǎn)生問題背传，你可以花一些時(shí)間獨(dú)處，給他或她寫一封封信谷婆。給自己三個(gè)小時(shí)來寫一封充滿愛的書信慨蛙。
當(dāng)你寫信的時(shí)候，練習(xí)深入觀察你們關(guān)系的本質(zhì)纪挎。為什么溝通如此困難?為什么幸福一直不可能?你可能會想這樣開始:“我親愛的兒子期贫，我知道你在過去的許多年里受了很多苦。我沒能幫助你——事實(shí)上异袄，我使情況更糟了通砍。我并不想讓你受苦，我的孩子烤蜕。也許我的技術(shù)不夠熟練埠帕。也許我試圖把我的想法強(qiáng)加給你，讓你痛苦玖绿。過去我以為是你讓我受苦，我的痛苦都是你造成的∪蓿現(xiàn)在我意識到我要為自己的痛苦負(fù)責(zé)斑匪，是我讓你受苦的。作為你的父親，我不想讓你受苦蚀瘸〗频”
花三個(gè)小時(shí)，甚至一天贮勃，寫這樣一封信贪惹。你會發(fā)現(xiàn)，寫完信你已經(jīng)像變了一個(gè)人一樣寂嘉。平和奏瞬、理解和同情已經(jīng)改變了你。二十四小時(shí)就能創(chuàng)造奇跡泉孩。這就是愛的言語的實(shí)踐硼端。
Loving speech
If you have difficulties with someone in your life, you might spend some time alone and write a letter to him or her. Give yourself three hours to write a letter using loving speech.
While you write the letter, practice looking deeply into the nature of your relationship. Why has communication been difficult? Why has happiness not been possible? You may want to begin like this, “My dear son, I know you have suffered a lot during the past many years. I have not been able to help you—in fact, I have made the situation worse. It is not my intention to make you suffer, my son. Maybe I am not skillful enough. Maybe I try to impose my ideas on you and I make you suffer. In the past I thought you made me suffer, that my suffering was caused by you. Now I realize that I have been responsible for my own suffering, and that I have made you suffer. As your father, I don’t want you to suffer.”
Spend three hours, even a day, writing such a letter. You will find that the person who finishes the letter is not the same person who began it. Peace, understanding, and compassion have transformed you. A miracle can be achieved in twenty-four hours. That is the practice of loving speech.
