2020-03-12
S老師在介紹美國文化時(shí)提到一個詞personal space买决，我就順勢問了一下美國的社交距離social distance問題。為了比對彤守，S老師講到日本人是social distance最遠(yuǎn)的诽凌。并形象地舉例說在很遠(yuǎn)的地方就鞠躬90度，并熱情地一句：
おはようございます (Ohayōgozaimasu跷坝，早上好)，或久しぶり(Hisashiburi碉碉，好久不見)柴钻。畫面感很強(qiáng)。
而美國人則不同誉裆。下圖的這種距離對于日本人來講可能有點(diǎn)太近了顿颅。
以下是隨時(shí)能看到的缸濒，各種各樣的都有：親吻足丢、握手、擁抱庇配、摟一下斩跌、擊一下拳頭、肘部等捞慌。以上大約是熟人之間耀鸦。即便在路上行走，遇見陌生人，也會打個招呼袖订，甚至開車的人也會對迎面的行人舉手示意一下氮帐。不同年齡段、不同場合都有不同表現(xiàn)洛姑。但不管怎樣上沐，根本不會由這些行為聯(lián)想到性。這有點(diǎn)像看運(yùn)動員們跳水或游泳楞艾，他們著裝再少参咙，而你卻只關(guān)注是否取得了勝利。
所以文化的差異硫眯，需要關(guān)注蕴侧。這樣才能避免因文化的差異引起一些誤會。這可能也是馬云提到的两入，人工智能無法代替語言的學(xué)習(xí)净宵。因?yàn)槲覀兪紫刃枰私鈱Ψ降奈幕?/p>
在我們朋友之間，除非喝酒喝多了痊夭，如果男男在大街上擁抱或手牽手(我還真在西安見過兩位老男人手牽手的情景刁岸，當(dāng)時(shí)倒吸一口氣!)總是給人不自在的感覺--酒喝我多了，有其中一位握著另一人手沒完沒了地說話者有之她我，但也少見手牽手者虹曙。同樣地，聊天時(shí)番舆，如果一個人無意識地一味地靠近酝碳，總要招來對方事后的表態(tài)：這人為什么聊天時(shí)這么距離近呢？
關(guān)于個人空間的問題恨狈，分別看幾個方面：
- 什么是個人空間Personal Space 疏哗？
About Personal Space
The term “personal space” generally refers to the physical distance between two people in a social, family, or work environment. Think of your personal space as the air between your body and an invisible shield, or bubble, you have formed around yourself for any relationship.
The distance between you and your shield most likely varies from one person to another, depending on a variety of factors, including how well you know the person, your relationship to that person, how much you trust him or her, and your culture. In order to put others at ease, it's important to understand the importance of personal space.
關(guān)于個人空間
術(shù)語“個人空間”通常是指在社交，家庭或工作環(huán)境中兩個人之間的物理距離禾怠。 可以將您的個人空間視為身體與看不見的盾牌或氣泡之間的空氣返奉，因?yàn)樗鼈冎g存在著任何關(guān)系。
您與盾牌之間的距離很可能因人而異吗氏，具體取決于多種因素芽偏，包括您對這個人的了解程度，與該人的關(guān)系弦讽，對他或她的信任程度以及您的文化污尉。 為了讓其他人放心，了解個人空間的重要性很重要。
- 個人空間的決定因素
Determining Factors for Personal Space
The comfortable space between you and someone you know well will probably be much smaller than it would be if you barely knew the other person. With a stranger, it is even greater. Typically, people who live in crowded cities have smaller personal space preferences than those who live in wide-open spaces.
Other factors that determine a comfortable personal space:
Male to male
Female to female
Male to female
Professional relationship – any combination of male and female
Romantic versus platonic relationship
Culture and country
Average comfort levels of personal space distance in the U.S.:
Approximately 0 to 20 inches for intimate couples
Approximately 1-1/2 feet to 3 feet for good friends and family members
Approximately 3 feet to 10 feet for casual acquaintances and coworkers
More than 4 feet for strangers
More than 12 feet for speaking to a large group
個人空間的決定因素
與您熟識的人之間的舒適空間可能比如果您幾乎不認(rèn)識對方時(shí)的舒適空間要小得多被碗。 與一個陌生人某宪，它甚至更大。 通常锐朴，居住在擁擠的城市中的人比居住在開放空間中的人對個人空間的偏好要小缩抡。
決定舒適個人空間的其他因素：(這里有些因素不甚了解)
男對男
女對女
男對女
專業(yè)關(guān)系–男女不限
浪漫與柏拉圖的關(guān)系
文化與鄉(xiāng)村
美國個人空間距離的平均舒適度：
親密伴侶：大約為0到20英寸
好朋友和家人：大約需要1-1 / 2英尺到3英尺
熟人和同事：約3到10英尺
陌生人：超過4英尺
與大群人交談時(shí)：超過12英尺
個人空間的基本規(guī)則
General Rules of Personal Space:
These rules vary according to culture and location, so they're not etched in stone. They're here as a guideline for social and professional etiquette.
Here are some basic rules:
Never touch anyone you don’t know.
Don’t reach for anyone else’s children, regardless of your intentions.
Stand at least 4 feet away from a person unless you know him or her well.
When someone leans away from you, you are probably in that person’s space that makes him or her uncomfortable. Take a step back.
If you walk into an auditorium or theater that isn’t crowded, leave an extra seat between you and the next person. However, it is acceptable to sit next to someone if the room is crowded.
Never lean over someone else’s shoulder to read something unless invited.
Never go through anyone else’s personal belongings.
Don’t allow your dog to go to the bathroom on someone else’s property.
Acknowledge personal space on the road. Don’t tailgate when driving.
Don’t fling your arm around someone’s shoulder or slap anyone on the back unless you know the person very well.
Don’t enter a room or office without knocking first.
Don’t cut in front of people in line.
個人空間一般規(guī)則：
這些規(guī)則因文化和位置而異，因此不會被刻蝕在石頭上(一成不變)包颁。這里是社交和職業(yè)禮儀的指南瞻想。
以下是一些基本規(guī)則：
切勿觸摸您不認(rèn)識的任何人。
無論您的意圖是什么娩嚼，都不要伸手去碰觸別人的孩子蘑险。
除非您非常了解他或她，否則請與他至少保持4英尺的距離岳悟。
當(dāng)某人向您傾斜時(shí)佃迄，您可能在該人的空間中，這會使他或她感到不舒服贵少。退后一步呵俏。
如果您走進(jìn)不擁擠的禮堂或劇院，請?jiān)谀拖乱粋€人之間留一個額外的座位滔灶。但是普碎，如果房間很擁擠，可以坐在某人旁邊录平。
除非受邀麻车，否則切勿倚靠別人的肩膀看東西。
切勿檢查別人的個人物品斗这。
請勿讓您的狗去別人家的洗手間动猬。
在路上確認(rèn)個人空間。開車時(shí)不要跟車太近表箭。
除非您非常了解對方赁咙，否則請勿將手臂甩在別人的肩膀上或拍打后面的任何人。
請勿不敲門進(jìn)入房間或??辦公室免钻。
不要在別人面前插隊(duì)彼水。
工作中的個人空間
Personal Space at Work
Observing boundaries in the office is important to maintaining professionalism. However, after working with people for years and getting to know them, these lines may have become blurred, especially if you work in cubicles or have an open office concept. Be aware of other people's reactions, and if they seem uncomfortable, add more space between you.
Keep in mind that others who don’t know you well, including supervisors, may misunderstand what they see. That is why you should observe professional distance while at the office and reserve more intimate gestures for after hours.
If you're working with a client or prospect, avoid the urge to get too close. The person may not want your service or product if they feel as though you're intruding on their personal space. You don't want to turn people off if you're trying to make a sale.
Work policies:
Be aware of company policies regarding relationships with coworkers.
Don’t assume your relationship with a coworker or supervisor is personal.
Avoid hugging or other familiar gestures, even if you have a personal relationship with them.
Only step into someone’s workspace if you know you are welcome. Be respectful if you sense the person is busy.
Save personal conversations for the lunch break or after hours.
工作中的個人空間
遵守辦公室的界限對于保持專業(yè)水平很重要。但是伯襟，在與人合作多年并了解他們之后猿涨，這些界限可能變得模糊了，尤其是當(dāng)您在小隔間工作或擁有開放式辦公室的概念時(shí)姆怪。注意其他人的反應(yīng)，如果他們看起來不舒服，請?jiān)谀g增加空間稽揭。
請記住俺附，其他不太了解您的人（包括主管）可能會誤解他們所看到的內(nèi)容。這就是為什么您在辦公室時(shí)應(yīng)保持專業(yè)距離并在下班后保留更多親密手勢的原因溪掀。
如果您正在與客戶或潛在客戶合作事镣，請避免與他人過于親近的沖動。如果他們覺得您正在干擾他們的個人空間揪胃，則該人可能不想要您的服務(wù)或產(chǎn)品璃哟。如果您想進(jìn)行交易又不能拒絕別人(turn people off )。
工作方針：
了解有關(guān)與同事關(guān)系的公司政策喊递。
不要以為您與同事或主管的關(guān)系是私人的随闪。
避免擁抱或其他熟悉的手勢，即使您與他們有個人關(guān)系骚勘。
僅當(dāng)知道自己受到歡迎時(shí)才進(jìn)入某人的工作空間铐伴。
如果您感到對方很忙，請保持??尊重俏讹。
在午餐休息時(shí)間或下班后控制個人對話時(shí)間当宴。
- 如果有人侵入您的個人空間怎么辦
What to Do if Someone Invades Your Personal Space
When someone gets uncomfortably close to you, there are several things you can do. Keep in mind that being direct may hurt the other person’s feelings, so before speaking your mind, determine whether or not the issue is worth bringing up.
Ways to deal with space intrusion:
Accept it.
Lean away from the person or take a step back, hoping he or she will take the hint.
Come right out and say you are uncomfortable being so close.
Explain why you need more space. For example, if you are left-handed and the person is too close to your left side, comment on how you need the space to take notes without your elbow being jostled.
如果有人侵入您的個人空間怎么辦
當(dāng)有人不舒服地靠近您時(shí)，您可以執(zhí)行幾項(xiàng)操作泽疆。請記住户矢，直言不諱可能會傷害對方的感覺垫释，因此在說出自己的想法之前识脆，請確定是否值得提出這個問題。
解決空間入侵的方法：
接受葫隙。
遠(yuǎn)離人株依，或退后一步驱证，希望他或她會得到提示。
馬上說出來恋腕，你是如此的親密抹锄。
解釋為什么需要更多空間。例如荠藤，如果您慣用左手伙单，而此人離您的左側(cè)太近，請?jiān)u論一下如何需要空間來做筆記哈肖，而不會肘部被打亂吻育。
- 教孩子如何保護(hù)自己的個人空間
Teach Kids How to Protect Their Personal Space
When teaching manners to small children, show them how to protect their boundaries and respect the personal space of others. Explain how important it is to follow the wishes of people who tell them to back off. Make sure you tell them in a language they understand.
Some parents use the bubble analogy, explaining that everyone has an invisible bubble around them, and when you get too close, it pops. Also, tell your children that they should let you know if anyone tries to touch them inappropriately.
教孩子如何保護(hù)自己的個人空間
在教小孩子禮貌時(shí)，向他們展示如何保護(hù)自己的邊界并尊重他人的個人空間淤井。解釋服從告訴他們退后的人們的意愿有多重要布疼。確保以他們理解的語言告訴他們摊趾。
一些父母使用泡沫比喻，解釋說每個人周圍都有一個看不見的泡沫游两，當(dāng)你離得太近時(shí)砾层，它就會彈出。另外贱案，告訴您的孩子肛炮，如果有人試圖不當(dāng)?shù)赜|摸他們，他們應(yīng)該讓您知道宝踪。
資料來源或進(jìn)一步參閱：
https://www.thespruce.com/etiquette-rules-of-defining-personal-space-1216625
https://www.slideshare.net/monzoluis/personal-space-between-countries
https://casework.eu/lesson/proximity-and-distance/
https://progressivearmy.com/2016/08/26/americas-social-distance-crisis/
https://www.slideshare.net/BharathShankar3/personal-space-web-20
