And this made me feel even more ridiculous --?hurt, really.?But there on that night, I did not stop believing.?I just believed a new thing:?that it was possible not to believe.?It was possible the answers I had were wrong,?that the questions themselves were wrong.?And now, where there was once a mountain of certitude,?there was, running right down to its foundation,?a spring of doubt,?a spring that promised rivers.?
這讓我心里感覺(jué)更荒謬了略贮， 挺受傷的，真的。 但就在那一夜攻谁，我沒(méi)有停止相信断盛。 我只是相信了另一件事： 就是“一個(gè)人也可以選擇不相信”。 很可能我的答案都是錯(cuò)的肛跌， 很可能問(wèn)題本身就是錯(cuò)的艺配。 現(xiàn)在，只要曾經(jīng)聳立著信仰山峰的地方衍慎， 就會(huì)有一股小溪转唉、 一股質(zhì)疑的小溪一直流到山腳， 它注定會(huì)匯聚成河流稳捆。
I can trace the whole drama of my life?back to that night in that church?when my savior did not come for me;?when the thing I believed most certainly?turned out to be, if not a lie,?then not quite the truth.?And even though most of you prepared for Y2K in a very different way,?I'm convinced that you are here?because some part of you has done the same thing that I have done?since the dawn of this new century,?since my mother left and my father stayed away?and my Lord refused to come.?And I held out my hand,?reaching for something to believe in.?
我人生中所有的戲劇性故事赠法， 都可以追溯回教堂里那一晚， 那時(shí)我的救世主沒(méi)有到來(lái)乔夯； 事實(shí)證明我無(wú)比確信的事物砖织， 如果不是“謊言”的話款侵， 至少也不是什么真理。 雖然在座大部分人迎接千禧年的方式大不相同侧纯， 但我相信你們之所以在這里新锈， 就是因?yàn)槟銈冇行┤俗鲞^(guò)與我一樣的事情， 新世紀(jì)開(kāi)啟之后眶熬， 我的母親去世壕鹉， 父親離去， 我的救世主沒(méi)來(lái)聋涨。 我伸出雙手晾浴， 苦苦搜尋一絲能夠讓我相信的東西。
I held on when I arrived at Yale at 18,?with the faith that my journey from Oak Cliff, Texas?was a chance to leave behind all the challenges I had known,?the broken dreams and broken bodies I had seen.?But when I found myself back home one winter break,?with my face planted in the floor,?my hands tied behind my back?and a burglar's gun pressed to my head,?I knew that even the best education couldn't save me.?
當(dāng)我18歲到耶魯大學(xué)時(shí)牍白， 我相信從德州的小鎮(zhèn)一路走來(lái)脊凰， 就有機(jī)會(huì)擺脫一切我所歷經(jīng)的困苦與艱難， 擺脫那些破碎的夢(mèng)想茂腥、 殘疾的軀體狸涌。 但當(dāng)我寒假回鄉(xiāng)， 臉被摁在地上最岗、雙手被綁在身后帕胆、強(qiáng)盜的手槍頂著我的腦袋時(shí)， 我知道般渡，即使是最好的教育也救不了我懒豹。
I held on when I showed up at Lehman Brothers?as an intern in 2008.?
2008年當(dāng)我到雷曼兄弟實(shí)習(xí)時(shí)， 我也搜尋著驯用。
So hopeful --?that I called home to inform my family?that we'd never be poor again.?
充滿了希望脸秽，我興奮地打電話給家人， 說(shuō)我們永遠(yuǎn)不會(huì)再貧窮了蝴乔。
But as I witnessed this temple of finance?come crashing down before my eyes,?I knew that even the best job couldn't save me.?
但當(dāng)我親眼看著這座金融圣殿就在眼前坍塌時(shí)记餐， 我知道，即使是最好的工作也救不了我薇正。
I held on when I showed up in Washington DC as a young staffer,?who had heard a voice call out from Illinois,?saying, "It's been a long time coming,?but in this election, change has come to America."?But as the Congress ground to a halt?and the country ripped at the seams?and hope and change began to feel like a cruel joke,?I knew that even the political second coming?could not save me.?
當(dāng)我在華盛頓特區(qū)做一名年輕職員時(shí)片酝，我搜尋著， 我聽(tīng)見(jiàn)伊利諾伊州的一個(gè)聲音： （指奧巴馬競(jìng)選演說(shuō)） “大家等待的太久了挖腰，” “但這次選舉雕沿， 美國(guó)將會(huì)迎來(lái)變革∈锬簦” 但當(dāng)國(guó)會(huì)停滯晦炊， 國(guó)家?guī)缀醴直离x析，所謂希望和變革都變成了殘酷的玩笑時(shí)， 我知道断国，即使是政治的新生也救不了我贤姆。
I had knelt faithfully at the altar of the American Dream,?praying to the gods of my time?of success,?and money,?and power.?But over and over again,?midnight struck, and I opened my eyes?to see that all of these gods were dead.?
我在美國(guó)夢(mèng)的圣壇前虔誠(chéng)地跪拜著， 向時(shí)代的偉人們祈禱稳衬， 祈求成功霞捡、金錢(qián)和權(quán)利。 但是一再地薄疚， 午夜來(lái)臨碧信，我睜開(kāi)雙眼， 看見(jiàn)這些神話全都破滅了街夭。
