練習(xí)
Topic: young people are leaving their homes from rural areas to study or work in city. What are the reasons. Do advantage of this development outbalance its disadvantage??

phase1:不要老想著套模板 記不得了就自己寫一個就完事了
It is not uncommon for many young people from remote regions to migrate to cities for work or study. Although this development may brings about some negative issues, i deem that it should be embraced with more optimism.

phase2: 注意連詞
Developed and modern city is a platform where young people are able to obtain more opportunities. For instance, there are many international well-known companies like Google and Baidu in big cities, which provide employees with high-paid jobs. Working in these companies can help them acquire specialized skills and broaden their horizons, thus contributing positively to their career development.

phase3 稍微寫一點
On the other hand, this development can also has some beneficial effects on cities. One prominent advantage is that it injects vitality into city's development.
increase the local government's financial incomes

phase4
However, despite the many benefits, we can not ignore its drawback. It can be predicted that the city may become more crowded and the living condition in city may worse considering the limited resources.

Phase5
In conclusion, I believe that moving to city for work or study brings more advantages. Even though it may brings some negative issues, it do exert beneficial effect on individuals and cities.

Desipte

重要的詞匯

weaken cohesion [k???hi:?n] 凝聚力
raise morale 提升士氣
vitality

重要：Another main factor supporting the new generation is concerned with the physical strength

indispensable 不可或缺的
fail to
play a key/critical/crucial role
analyze issue from different perspectives and come up with original suggestions
instill

issue 問題; （報刊的） 期
item項目; 條

第一段的開頭

Mobile phones are very popular among modern people as they greatly facilitate our daily life. However ,while it gains popularity, a lot criticism also follow. Some people claim that
This viewpoint sounds reasonable, but these two things should not be treated in the same way.

One argument commonly raised that……

merit demerit
drawback benefits

one of the concerns for working parents is children's growth education.

第一段的結(jié)尾

1阶祭、Although multicultural societies have some negative issues尚粘，I deem that it should be embraced with more optimism.

Although student can benefit a lot from the experience in a gap-year挺举，It's drawbacks cannot be ignored.

2、Personally speaking , encouraging children to grow up under the care of their grandparents is a superior choice although children' centre sometimes can have a auxiliary role to play.
auxiliary [?:g?z?li?ri] 輔助的; 備用的

3叽掘、It is not uncommon for organizations to have elder people as senior management team. However i would argue that young people are qualified to take major position in today's world

4拣技、However, despite the potential risks they pose, they exert more beneficial effects on individuals and society.

5偏形、As far as i am concerned, the merits of this practice outbalance its possible demerits.

結(jié)尾：

1敏储、Both …… and…… have a indispensable role in cultivating a ……
assume responsibility of taking care of children

2、To conclusion, I am quite optimistic/pessimistic about the prospect of ……
So i also advocate that governments should make efforts to bring these minorities into globalization.

3丁侄、In conclusion, my view is that

4惯雳、In closing, i believe that moving some business to rural areas will bring more advantages. Even though it might bring about some problems, it is still a preferable attempt in the long run.

5、In conclusion, detrimental as social networking sites appear to be in some aspects ,they do benefit the general society educationally and …….

段落

There is overwhelming evidence on this
One prominent advantage
The reasons for this trend may involve the recognition+事實