I used to thought, in my industry, you have to be knowledgeable and experienced to be a team leader. Because there’s always all kinds of technical problems awaits you. I used to be scared of being a team leader. Because I am not sure if I could solve all the problems I encountered in my project, let alone other team members’ hows. What if they come to me and ask: “manager, how should I handle this? How could I handle that?” And my inner voice could only reply ”I have no idea.” That would be awkward.

在我工作的注冊會計師事務所行業(yè)里面，我一直覺得我們得非常專業(yè)和有經(jīng)驗才能做好一個團隊領導，因為在項目上總會遇到各種各樣的技術問題吻育。我以前一直很怕帶隊來著，因為我覺得我自己在項目上的問題我都不一定能馬上搞得掂鸽心，更何況別人問我怎么辦的時候。如果我?guī)ш牭膱F隊成員跑過來問我：“經(jīng)理居暖，我們遇到這個問題要怎么辦顽频？那個問題要怎么辦？”而我聽完以后內心只有一句回復：“我也不知道啊太闺∨淳埃”那就真的有點尷尬了。而且有的時候項目時間緊跟束，真的是自己的活都要干不完莺奸、自己的問題都沒研究清楚，還要幫別人研究問題真的是心有余而力不足冀宴。

The year before last year, I joint a training class of my company on how to improve the auditing skills as an assistant manager. At that time, what impressed me most is not lessons on how to perform test of controls and substantive testing, but the lesson on how to be a project manager.

前年我參加了我們會計師事務所的一次助理經(jīng)理審計技能提升培訓班灭贷。那次培訓給我印象最深不是教我們如何做控制測試和實質性程序的課程，而是一節(jié)“如何做一個項目經(jīng)理略贮？”

The teacher introduced us the leadership style of coaching, with a model to perform it, GROW. With coaching, you don’t have to know all the answers to all the questions in order to be a good leader, but you need to know how to motivate others to find solutions by asking questions.

課上老師講了一種新型的領導力方式：教練式領導甚疟。以及一個可以讓該領導力方式落地的GROW模型。在教練式領導下逃延，一個人不一定非得能夠解決所有問題才能當領導览妖，你只要會提問，懂得如何用提問的方式來激勵團隊成員想出解決方式揽祥，就能做一個合格的團隊領導讽膏。

Now I want you to imagine that, there are 2 equally good tennis players. Then 1 will be coached by a tennis coach, the other will be coached by a ski coach. Who will be a better tennis player after 1 month training with their coaches?

有一個小故事，有兩個水平不相伯仲的網(wǎng)球運動員拄丰，一個將由網(wǎng)球教練教府树，另外一個由滑雪教練教俐末，一個月后哪個教練教出來的網(wǎng)球運動員水平會更好？

To our surprise, is the one trained with the ski coach. You know why? Because the ski coach never judge, he just asked questions:” What do you think of your performance today? How do you think you can adjust it? Are there any other solutions to it? What kind of support do you need? “ The ski coach tend to help the player to find answers by motivating their self-reflection. It’s a famous story about the leadership style of coaching.

出人意料的是奄侠，滑雪教練教出了更好的網(wǎng)球運動員卓箫。答案有點令人費解，理由也是耐人尋味垄潮。因為滑雪教練并不會評價他的學員做得好不好烹卒，他只是一直不停在問問題：“你覺得你今天表現(xiàn)怎么樣啊弯洗？你覺得哪里需要調整旅急，怎么調整啊涂召？有沒有別的方法能夠更好地提高你的表現(xiàn)白狗恰敏沉？你需要我怎么幫助你訓練肮？”滑雪教練因為并不完全懂網(wǎng)球的技巧盟迟，所以更傾向于提問來讓運動員自我反思秋泳，從而幫助運動員自己尋找到答案。這是教練式領導風格來源的一個很有名的小故事攒菠。

The model of GROW is the abbreviation of Goal, Reality, Option, Will. GROW lead us the way to motivate people to understand their goal and reality, then find solutions, make options, get the willpower to carry out tasks.

幫助教練式領導風格落地的GROW模型是四個英文單詞的縮寫迫皱，目標Goal, 現(xiàn)實Reality,選擇 Option,和意愿Will。GROW模型引導我們從四個角度去想怎么問問題辖众，從而激發(fā)別人去認識到他們的目標卓起、現(xiàn)實，想出多種解決方案凹炸，從多種解決方案中作出選擇戏阅，然后排除顧慮建立信念，開始執(zhí)行啤它。

But you can’t coach them by simply throw all the questions: what is your goal? What is your reality? Do you have any options? Are you willing to do it with the solution you come up with? Never do that. They will get muddled.

在運用GROW模型的過程中奕筐，切記不能簡單粗暴地一股腦兒把所有問題拋給對方：你的目標是什么？你的現(xiàn)實是什么变骡？你有什么解決方案嗎离赫？你有足夠的意愿來做這個事情嗎？四個問題砸過去塌碌，不暈也懵了渊胸。

Leadership is art. Under different circumstances, ask different questions to help them figure out their own GROW.

領導力是門藝術。在不同的情境下台妆，要用不同的問題引導你團隊的小伙伴想清楚他們的GROW,才是正道翎猛。所以保持GROW模型這個方向在心中瓢捉，然后刻意練習問問題的方式很重要。

For G, we ask to figure out the plausible goal of the task, or career planning. For my career, sometimes I wanted to achieve incompatible goals. Like I want a balanced life with less extra working hours, and I also wanted fast promotion. But it seems not so possible to get fast promotion if you don’t work extra hours. I need to ask myself seriously, if I can’t achieve both goals at the same time, Which goal is more important?

從G（Goal）講起办成，通過問問題找出來準確泡态、可行的目標是關鍵。這不僅僅適用于具體的任務迂卢，也適用于職業(yè)規(guī)劃某弦。在我的職業(yè)道路上，我有時候會有想要魚和熊掌兼得的貪心而克。一邊想著要加班少能平衡工作和生活就好了靶壮，一邊又想著快速晉升成就一番事業(yè)這個人生目標很誘人啊≡逼迹可是現(xiàn)實生活中腾降，普通背景的普通人，很難有不加班就能快速平步青云啊碎绎，能力都是在工作中鍛煉出來的螃壤，要想比別人升得快，最直觀的道路就是得比別人更努力啊筋帖。所以相互矛盾的目標面前奸晴，一定要引導對方或自己想清楚，有沒有兼顧的方法日麸？如果沒有寄啼，哪個目標更重要？

For R, reality is simple, but because sometimes we tend to blind ourselves, accept the reality and reconcile with it is hard. When trying to figure out the reality, it is important to ask what instead of why. What are the difficulties? What have you done yet? What are the results? We can show our concerns to team members by asking them what, rather than querying why.

再來談R（Reality）代箭，現(xiàn)實其實很簡單墩划，但是做人嘛，總是會自欺欺人的時候嗡综，這個時候接受現(xiàn)實乙帮、與現(xiàn)實和解就沒有那么容易了。當試圖搞清楚現(xiàn)實的時候蛤高，一個重要原則是少問“為什么”蚣旱，多問“是什么”。遇到的困難是什么戴陡？你做過什么努力塞绿？結果如何？問“是什么”能讓隊友感覺到你在關心他恤批，也體現(xiàn)出想要了解情況一起討論解決方案的誠意异吻，而“為什么”這種問法總有些質問的含義在里面。換個角度溝通效果完全不一樣。

For O, Brainstorming is a good way to make options. Keep on asking for more solutions means more chances of breaking the deadlock.

對于O（Option）诀浪，通過一直不停地問“還有嗎棋返？“促使對方不停地頭腦風暴，能夠帶來更多的解決方案雷猪，也更有可能為目前的問題找到突破口睛竣。這個時候注意不要評判對方錯誤的方案，也不能替對方做選擇求摇，而是要引導其找出正確的選擇方案射沟。

For W, Willpower to execute is the key to success. “When will you get started? What are you going to start with? What hinders you from taking actions? Do you need any support?”

W（Will）是最終成功解決問題的關鍵，這一步在于引導對方想清楚該怎么做之后与境，幫助他消除最后的顧慮開始執(zhí)行验夯。這時要問：”你打算什么時候開始行動啊摔刁？打算怎么做挥转？有什么顧慮嗎？需要誰的幫助和支持嗎共屈？“

My mom is a huge fan of controlling her kids, She always wanted everything done by her expectations. But she got confused when the result turned out to be unexpected, like my young brother’s school grade. She often asked me to introduce my learning methods to my brother. I called him:” hey, bro, seems like you’re in trouble now. I have showed you my learning methods before for many times, that’s helpful for me, but maybe it’s not the best for you. Do you have any idea how you’re going to handling this and stop mom from bothering me?” He’s a brilliant boy and he has his own ideas. All we need is just to motivate him to analyze possible solutions and encourage him do it his own way. Then I called my mom:” Please get rid of your sense of control, asking to motivate, do not judge.”

我媽是一個對孩子特別有控制欲的人绑谣，我知道她的出發(fā)點是希望子女一切順利，不要遇到什么大風大浪趁俊。但是在這個信念的執(zhí)行過程中總變成了她希望子女什么都按照她的想法來做域仇。一旦結果不盡如她意的時候她又覺得無所適從刑然，找不到解決方法寺擂。比如我弟弟考試一沒考好的時候，她就會打電話過來問我怎么辦泼掠，想讓我教教弟弟怎么學習怔软。我打電話給我弟弟：“嗨，我感覺你最近有點不妙霸裾颉挡逼！沒考好老媽會一直揪著你不放的。我其實已經(jīng)跟你講過很多次我的學習方法了腻豌，但是別的人方法終究是別人的家坎，不一定適合你。不管是別人分享的方法還是你自己想出來的辦法吝梅，只有適合你的學習方法才是最好虱疏。你自己心里有沒有什么想法？有沒有想過你該怎么做才讓下次考試成績提升上來苏携？也讓老媽少叨叨你我?guī)拙渥龅桑俊彼鋵嵤且粋€很聰明的小朋友，也是一個有想法的人。相比填鴨式教育装蓬，我覺得教練式引導教育法對他來說更合適著拭。多激勵他，引導他去找出最適合他的學習方法牍帚，鼓勵他按自己的方式來安排自己的學習和休息才是正確的做法儡遮。和他聊完我打給我媽：“一定要記著要放下自己的控制欲，多想想暗赶，或許通過詢問來激勵孩子峦萎，鼓勵他，相信他的潛力忆首，比對他各種行為方式指指點點一定要按你說的來效果更好吧爱榔。”

The essence of management is to motivate people, rather than constraint them. “I believe in you” is one of the most powerful words in the world. Believe in the potential in us and people around us. Do not judge, coach them, and they will grow.

管理的本質是激勵人而不是束縛人糙及∠暧模“ 我相信你”這句話是這個世界上最有力量的一句話。尤其是父母對子女說這句話浸锨，激發(fā)的力量是無窮的唇聘。我們要多學著相信自己和周圍人的潛力，少評價柱搜，多引導迟郎， 這樣我們和我們周圍的人才能成為更好的自己。